| la de da |
[17 May 2005|07:59am] |
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 calm |
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music |
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John Mayer - 83 |
] |
the la de da was founded by my friend lunchbox.. she was the one who found it and started to use it. i saw it my first time in a dream. it was written on my text book in my dream. then the next day lunchbbox came up to me and wrote it on my book. and i got soo flabbergastered. hehehe
sry for that. 1st period again!! if you guys were to ask me how i am doing i would probably say im fine, or alrite. inside i dont think i am alrite. ive been learning new things about me. and i wish i knew what i want. Y DOES LIFE HAVE TO BE SUCH A BITCH!!!!!! Y!!!! everything else is alrite i guess.
i lost over 20 lbs from my DONT EAT SHIT program!!!! heheh :)
"she buzzing just like neon.
who knows how long how long."
i dont want to be alone anymore!!!!
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| orange, yellow, and black. |
[15 Feb 2005|07:40am] |
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 blank |
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music |
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phish - silent in the morning |
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half z, 2 1/8s, 2 tabs, 5 vails, 10 caps, 5 stems, 4 seeds, a sheet of doses, 4 lines, 15 different types of pills, 4 balloons, 2 rocks, and nice little glass spoon bowl!!!!
man i wish!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! valentine's day SUCK!!! i wish i still had my valentine from the summer.
Computers is sooo gay!!! publisher is lame. im sry but it is. i think im ready to die. like if i was to die i would be fine with it. its that nice to know. :'( well im starting to have a bad day. so i shall be on later.
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| you are getting sleepy.... i am getting sleepy. |
[07 Feb 2005|07:40am] |
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music |
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live and let die |
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i need new habits and i need to sleep. i do not sleep as much. wow i just blacked out. i think the reason for all of these black outs and depression scenes and anything else is from my sleepiness!!!! AHH!!!!! im soo ready for bed! get me out of here. please. oh man i need too leave.
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| best part of fight club |
[04 Feb 2005|10:05am] |
INT. KITCHEN - LATE NIGHT
Tyler and Jack have fat stains and rips on their clothes from the waste
dump. The pots boil. Tyler stirs. He sticks a spoon into a pot and
lifts up a scoop of the glycerin layer. Then, he grabs a can, opens,
it.
TYLER
Lye -- the crucial ingredient for making soap. A paste of lye and
water can burn through an aluminum pan. A solution of lye and water
will dissolve a wooden spoon. Combined with water, lye heats to over
two hundred degrees.
Tyler licks his lips until they're gleaming wet. He takes Jack's hand
and KISSES the back of it. The saliva shines in the shape of the kiss.
Tyler poises the can of lye over Jack's hand.
TYLER
This is a chemical burn, and it will hurt more than you've ever been
burned.
Tyler pours a bit of the flaked lye onto Jack's hand. Jack's whole
body JERKS. Tyler holds tight to Jack's hand. Tears well in Jack's
eyes; his face tightens.
TYLER
Look at your hand.
Jack looks -- the burn is swollen glossy in the shape of Tyler's kiss.
Jack's face spasms, but he forces himself to endure it.
JACK (V.O.)
Tyler's kiss was a bonfire or a branding iron on my hand at the end of
a long, long road I pictured miles away from me.
PG 70
Jack takes his gaze off his hand and his eyes become glazed and
detached.
TYLER
Come back to the pain.
JACK (V.O.)
Guided meditation worked for cancer it could work for this.
TYLER
Don't shut this out.
JACK (V.O.)
I didn't think of the words "pain" or "searing flesh". I was going to
my cave to find my power animal.
Quick CUT TO:
INT. CAVE
Marla, looking beautiful in a stunning black dress.
As soon as Tyler speaks, we CUT BACK TO:
INT. KITCHEN - NIGHT
Tyler squeezing Jack's hand. Jack's eyes re-focus on Tyler.
TYLER
This is the greatest moment of your life and you're off somewhere,
missing it. Listen. Your father was your model for God. And if your
father bails out, what does that tell you about God?
Jack's face spasms in pain. He keeps his attention on Tyler.
TYLER
You have to consider the possibility that God doesn't like you. He
hates you. This is not the worst thing that can happen. His hate is
better that His indifference.
Jack becomes dazed again. CUT TO:
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| this is to long nights of lost thoughts and cold hearts |
[19 Jan 2005|02:51pm] |
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mood |
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 cold |
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music |
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waste- phish |
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i really like that ^.... it sounds cool and too much of an emo song tho. but yea. ive been really emo lately. its mostly becuz im lost in the middle. i hate this. first off y did you say the things that you say but then forget you said them. Y? how can one do that to someone else. syou care then you want to be freinds. and you dont wanna lose that. i fucking still love you. ok fine maybe you can say it wasnt or isnt love but you know what i want to hear you say you dont feel the same. cuz if you can i think you have one iced over heart. dont read this and be mad. cuz you know how i feel. and i dont no how you feel. but right now i keep this painted face on until this is all done. ok well bye.
p.s. y do i type in this if no one reads this. ....
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| Answer: All of the Above |
[13 Jan 2005|10:49pm] |
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mood |
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 grateful |
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music |
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straylight run |
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i havent actually updated in so long. nothing is new. nothing is ever new. i dont wanna write in this thing anymore ill leave this with a statement and how i feel.
"if you look, there are signs everywhere to help you find your way." you know what i think i need to stop and look at the signs and tell you how i really feel. its burning a hole in my heart.
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| this is where i stop |
[05 Jan 2005|08:11am] |
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music |
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the beatles and i saw her standing there |
] |
this is where i stop in my tracks
dead in my last step.
fall to the ground and stare up
looking at the sky of blue and green.
i dont want to move anymore
so i can stay in this memory.
i would stay with you here
here in this moment and time.
well ill get up anyway
ill get up to see your face
the face i linger to see
the beauty of the face is shown.
so here i go
walking to your door
and through the entrance
where you are standing there
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| She's got a lot of pretty, pretty boys that she calls friends |
[04 Jan 2005|07:37am] |
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mood |
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 content |
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music |
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Hotel California - The Eagles |
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On a dark desert highway
Cool wind in my hair
Warm smell of colitas
Rising up through the air
Up ahead in the distance
I saw a shimmering light
My head grew heavy, and my sight grew dim
I had to stop for the night
There she stood in the doorway
I heard the mission bell
And I was thinking to myself
This could be Heaven or this could be Hell
Then she lit up a candle
And she showed me the way
There were voices down the corridor
I thought I heard them say
Welcome to the Hotel California
Such a lovely place
Such a lovely place (background)
Such a lovely face
Plenty of room at the Hotel California
Any time of year
Any time of year (background)
You can find it here
You can find it here
Her mind is Tiffany twisted
She's got the Mercedes bends
She's got a lot of pretty, pretty boys
That she calls friends
How they dance in the courtyard
Sweet summer sweat
Some dance to remember
Some dance to forget
So I called up the Captain
Please bring me my wine
He said
We haven't had that spirit here since 1969
And still those voices are calling from far away
Wake you up in the middle of the night
Just to hear them say
Welcome to the Hotel California
Such a lovely Place
Such a lovely Place (background)
Such a lovely face
They're livin' it up at the Hotel California
What a nice surprise
What a nice surprise (background)
Bring your alibies
Mirrors on the ceiling
Pink champagne on ice
And she said
We are all just prisoners here
Of our own device
And in the master's chambers
They gathered for the feast
They stab it with their steely knives
But they just can't kill the beast
Last thing I remember
I was running for the door
I had to find the passage back to the place I was before
Relax said the nightman
We are programed to recieve
You can check out any time you like
But you can never leave
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| OMG this is how i feel!!!!!!! |
[02 Jan 2005|06:07pm] |
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mood |
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 artistic |
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music |
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a day in a life - beatles |
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Quickie:
There's no reason to lower your expectations. Go for what you really want.
Overview:
Prepare for some flattering revelations via an impromptu heart-to-heart talk with someone special. Whether it's time to say 'I'm sorry' or 'I love you' -- you couldn't choose a better day for it.
my horoscope for today!!!!! i need to say i love you to someone but idk. so bye bye.
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| girl with blue shattered eyes and a kid with ripped out lies |
[23 Dec 2004|07:56am] |
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mood |
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awake |
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music |
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maroon 5 |
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im sitting next to 2 kids in computers that is listening to Tu Pac. remember that song that they released after he got shot. i dont no the name but i dont wanna ask the kids and get jumped. hehhe. only about less then 5 hours left of skool because of half day. i need to do soo much shit today. and the worst part is i have to work today too. THAT FUCKING SUCKS!!!!! i have come across a path in my road where i need to tell you things. the things i need to say are things im afraid to tell you. im afraid because im afraid of being hurt. so i dont know if i wanna go down that path. i think it will be fine but still im scaried. well i have like 4 minutes left and i wanted to type up something. PeACE
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| Worried about a friend who drinks or does drugs? Dont Walk Away! |
[15 Dec 2004|07:45am] |
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mood |
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 crazy |
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music |
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best feeling |
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La De Da. . . . work is fucking crazy! too much work makes Joey go fucking insane and no more social life!!!! i fucking hate this! so i now i dont have friends. no dan, no rich, no jewno, and andrew(he left me for hollister and becuz he hated our boss), no em, and no NO ONE!!!! im a real no where man. im sitting in my no where land. so yea there is no new news because i have no life. im a dork. well happy holidays and have fun.
I woke to the world one morning
I did not really know what was going on
I didn't care about tomorrow
I worry when tomorrow comes
I went outside that night
set the ole imagination a flight
For one second I, I felt like a kid on Christmas day
Feeling stops all if said in a word
I will explain if I may
I climbed up a tree that night
I sat up in the branches and I felt like a bird
It was the best feeling in the world
I felt so good that night that my soul, it seemed to fly around that night
as I flew that night
For one second I felt like a bird
hangin' up in the air
feelin' stops all
if I said in a word
the feeling to be without a care
Swam in the sea that night
dove through the waves and I felt like a fish
it was the best feeling in the world
Felt so good that night
my soul it seemed to swim around that night
as I swam that night
For one second I
Felt like a fish
cruising around in the sea,
the feeling stops all
if I said in a word
the feeling to be free
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| will you spin me about? and then ill spring up and begin to shout. |
[06 Dec 2004|10:50pm] |
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mood |
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 drained |
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music |
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midtown. find comfort in yourself |
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GARY WON!! he won the first one. lets get into so harder stuff shall we? but first my day was ok. nothing really special. went to skool then work. how fun!
"Tipsy fuddled boozy groggy elevated Prime did edit her Hellborn elfchild roadhog mountain fortune hunter Man beheaded her" i dont want to go school tomorrow. GAY!!!! not fun!!!!!!!!!!! well comment me with the answer.
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| I love My forbidden Fruit |
[06 Dec 2004|07:41am] |
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mood |
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 accomplished |
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music |
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maroon 5 |
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this week was interesting. it was all mostly fun and confusion. i have a trippy sponge bob watch all thanks to Erica and Michele(my cuzins) and i got Live Phish 2 from Mario. thanks kids i love you guys. then i hung out with emily and her 3 PA friends. i smoked with 2 of them and it was fucking hilarious. then sunday i had work from fucking 9-9 a 12 hour day!!!!!!!! man those fucking suck! then i went to emily's house for about like 20 min and listened to this ska band making fun of all those stupid fucking CALIFORNIA PEOPLE!!!!! CALI PEOPLE STAY IN CALI AND NEW JERSEY PEOPLE, YOUR NOT FUCKING IN CALIFORNIA JERK OFFS!!!!! and if you were they dont fucking dress like that!!!! i mean seriously its a fucking gay fad thats going on! its sooooooooo stupid. but watever. watever makes you happy right? so i guess that it doesnt matter. i can only do so much. yea but im running contest. all you have to do is actually read these lj entries and find the lyrics that are in the entry and tell me wat band they are from. here ill start off with an easy one.
But what
Did you expect from me? What am I supposed to do?
You say that you're starting to feel like you're getting lost
Well, I do, too
Now figure that one out and leave me a comment. and ill update later. there is a present if you win. ill announce the winner. bye bye and good luck!!!!!!!!!!!!
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| bleu beanie (i spelt it right!!!!) |
[30 Nov 2004|07:39am] |
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mood |
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calm |
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music |
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i wont spend another night alone - ataris |
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aloha:
so yea, im actually writing in this lj again. its weird. i like just posting my poems and lyrics i like but i guess i should write in it too sometimes. so this is where i tell you about my days, my months, and my years. my year isnt that bad. im liking this school year and this year itself, im sad its leaving in about 32 days or 33 days. one of those. this month was crazy with concerts and wat not. string cheese incident on saturday was fucking sick as hell!!!! I LOVE HIPPIES!!!!!!!!! and then sunday i ate chinese food, after work, with my little disaster. hehehe. i dont know whats going on with that. but its all good cuz it makes me happy when im with that crazy little disaster. my days have been crazy. i havent been sleeping well. ive been wanting to just go home and sleep but i cant cuz i have work at 6 ALL THE TIME!!!!! and if i dont have work i have something else. its crazy! so right now im on overkill. if something bad is to happen i know for a fact i wont be able to handle it!!! I KNOW!!!!! well right now i need some sleep but i cant have it cuz im in school. 1st period Comp App Bus 1. oh listen to this to all the kids that dont go to my school. listen to what it says on the back of my I.D. tag.
1)This ID card must be worn at all times during the school day and must be shown to any member of the school staff upon request.
2)Do not damage, deface, or alter this card in any way.
3)Report a lost card to the main office immediately. The replacement cost of the ID card is $5.00.
FAILURE TO COMPLY WITH THE ABOVE RULES WILL RESULT IN DISCIPLINARY ACTION!!!
HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHHAHHAHHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA
my school sucks! I WANT A HIPPIE CLASS!! AND TO HAVE THIS FRIDAY OFF FOR NO REASON!!!
well im leaving ill leave you with a song.. Bye BYe PEaCE!!!!!! I <3 LOVE
"I Won't Spend Another Night Alone"
A star up in the sky goes slowly passing by,
The lights below...they spell out your name.
You're comfort on my mind and you're with me all the time.
And lots of feelings that I can't explain.
I won't spend another night alone.
Out of every girl I meet, no other can compete
I'd ditch 'em all for a night with you.
I know you don't believe you mean this much to me
But I promise you that you do.
If I had one wish this is what it would be...
I'd ask you to spend all your time here with me,
And we'd be together forever.
We'd buy a small house in south central L.A.
Raise lots of kids then we'd both join a gang
Just as long as we're together.
The things you make me wanna do
I'd rob a quik-e-mart for you
I'd go to the pound and let all the cats go free
Just as long as you'd be with me.
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| i don't know what to say and feel at times like this. |
[25 Nov 2004|02:48pm] |
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mood |
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blank |
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music |
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roses are free. |
] |
Take a piece of tinsel and put it on the tree
Cut a slab of melon and pretend that you still love me
Carve out a pumpkin and rely on your destiny
Get in your car and cruise the land of the brave and free
But don't forget to understand exactly what you put on the tree
Don't believe the florist when he tells you that the roses are free
Take a wrinkled raisin, and do with it what you will
Push it into third if you know you're gonna climb a hill
Eat plenty of lasagna 'til you know that you've had your fill
Resist all the urges that make you wanna go out and kill
But don't forget to understand exactly what you put on the tree
Don't believe the florist when he tells you that the roses are free
Throw that pumpkin at the tree
Unless you think that pumpkin holds your destiny
Cast it off into the sea
Bake that pie and eat it with me
Throw that pumpkin at the tree
Unless you think that pumpkin holds your destiny
Cast it off into the sea
Bake that pie and eat it with me.
It's easy sometimes when you just coast along
But like it or not something always seems to go wrong
Sometimes people build you up just so they can knock you down
Sometimes they will have you there 'cause they need someone around
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| this is for you to notice. |
[22 Nov 2004|08:15am] |
Giving it Away - Mae
And by the way you brought me here,
it makes me believe the best is still yet to come and I don't want to leave.
Forgive my hesitation but I'm learning to trust in you.
Help me to dream these dreams because I don't have a clue.
And if you'd be honest and say what you mean
you know I would promise I'd do anything
because I know that without you I'm giving it away.
Is this what you wanted?
'Cause I'm willing to change.
Now that I'm certain,
that there's much more to gain.
You've introduced me to the moment
oh but I'm looking to stay for good.
You asked me to stay forever.
Well, you know that I would, I would do anything.
And if you'd be honest and say what you mean
you know I would promise I'd do anything
'Cause I know that without you I'm giving it away.
The nights are forever and maybe I'm wrong,
but it feels like I'm so lost without you.
So I step towards the heat, it's the way I can see,
and it makes me believe that it's you.
And by the way you brought me here
it makes me believe the best is still yet to come and I don't want to leave,
I won't, but anyway...
If you'd be honest and say what you mean
you know I would promise I'd do anything
And the nights are forever, I can't get to sleep
'Cause I know there's a reason I'm in this too deep
And I'm sure that without you, I'm giving it away, yeah.
Summertime - Mae
Summertime, summertime brought me back to thinking you were mine all those times.
We laid it down and left it all behind, we were blind.
Oh, the summertime.
We could ride, we could ride.
Take my hand and watch the world go by.
Laugh or cry, well we need to try, get off the line, time to fly.
Oh, the summertime.
Go on ahead and let it fade away.
No looking back you know the past will stay.
It's you and me, we could get out of here.
Jump in and go and we could drive for years.
We could feel alive...
Here we are, here we are,
windows down we see a falling star.
Stop the car.
Waiting for nothing but our beating hearts, going far.
Oh, the summertime.
So feel the air, feel the air,
take the map and point to anywhere.
I don't care. Fingers through your hair,
the sky I've seen is blue and green.
Oh, the summertime.
Driving away, leaving it all behind.
Driving away, just driving away
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| This one is for you. |
[15 Nov 2004|10:19pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 crappy |
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music |
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limb by limb - phish |
] |
Lingering Eyes
Eyes that show so much
With colors we can't describe.
As I wish I can see them
I still wish I can forget.
The blue bold with the,
Gleaming green and yearn yellow,
Are these eyes that I love.
The lovely eyes are precious.
I get sad
The eyes aren't on me
But the brown of mine
Will be always on you.
So for now I shall wait.
Wait for something that isn't mine.
The eyes that I dream of at night
And the eyes I linger to see.
The mind loves the place that we go
Here is where I go to free my mind.
Here is where i get away.
Here is where I go day by day.
Here is where I look for something to find.
My mind is here most of the time.
Most of the time I just feel lost.
I feel lost because I feel not existing,
Existing to anyone or anything,
But no one cares or do they?
Do they notice how horrible I feel?
My mind is free here
I leave you there as I go here.
I must be here so I don't lose myself.
Losing myself to you in this war.
I gace up the battle but I will wint the war.
The war to lose you in my mind.
This mind of mine is made out of feelings,
And this broken heart has less blood then your eyes.
So in the end I need to be here.
Be here so I can stay insane.
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| Did You Know I Miss You? -SoCo |
[14 Nov 2004|10:37pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 crushed |
] |
| [ |
music |
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secret smile - phish |
] |
Your Eyes Begin To Fade
Blue-green eyes with the specks of yellow
The blonde hairs on my bed are from you
Scent of you on my clothes that won't come off
And my ways I can think of you
Far away yet seems so close
Wishing I was in the next seat over
I'm in another world it seems
When I can't get you out of my head
11:11 from SoCo and your not around
But I can see you in my head
The headlights of the car come close with your eyes
Blonde, Bold, and the Beautiful Bombshell steps out.
Just to let you know how I feel,
The way when you and I are here
Here together is when it all happens
Happening when the beautiful eyes fade.
I never wanted your eyes to fade. i hope you liked this.
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| the machine!!!!!!!!!!! HOLY SHIT!!!! |
[12 Nov 2004|07:40am] |
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mood |
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awake |
] |
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music |
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Pink Floyd |
] |
OMG the Machine was fucking sick!!!!!! high as the sky and tripping like a fat girl over some steps. oh man it was freaking great!!!!!! keller williams at starland too!!!! Dec. 9. string cheese at camden nov. 26-27. OH MAN!!!!!!
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| "OH Cursive Your So Cool!!!!" thats what they scream |
[07 Nov 2004|11:16pm] |
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mood |
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crazy |
] |
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music |
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cursive - art is hard |
] |
here are the 2 new poems. have fun and enjoy. let me know how you like them....
Your Eyes Begin To Fade
Blue-green eyes with the specks of yellow
The blonde hairs on my bed are from you
Scent of you on my clothes that won't come off
And my ways I can think of you
Far away yet seems so close
Wishing I was in the next seat over
I'm in another world it seems
When I can't get you out of my head
11:11 from SoCo and your not around
But I can see you in my head
The headlights of the car come close with your eyes
Blonde, Bold, and the Beautiful Bombshell steps out.
Just to let you know how I feel,
The way when you and I are here
Here together is when it all happens
Happening when the beautiful eyes fade.
Loud is Silent
The sound goes Dull,
While the black starts to begin.
The air is caught,
While the light is getting dim.
Seconds until you pass out
And the black bubbles up before your eyes.
The sound of the music fades,
Your knees down loses feeling and your mind denies.
The sound around mix into a buzz,
As your head gets light and eyes just see black.
The struggle stops and a little light in the fuzz.
The light is visible and your body gives out, falls on your back.
Your head hits the floor,
You take a last breathe,
Realizing its not working,
Until your body is lifeless and looks of death.
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